19 October 2007

Off Topic: When was the last time...

...you slept with abandon?

I was watching The Bean yesterday, happily splayed out in her Pack 'n' Play, arms up by her ears, and legs stretched, completely, ultimately, and totally relaxed. And sleeping with abandon.

(I have to write about that, I thought. Then promptly forgot it to Mommy Brain. I had to concentrate very hard last night to remember it again.)

It made me think. When was the last time I slept sprawled out and completely relaxed, not a care in the world, and none on the horizon?

I can't remember.

We'll just skip back to before The Bean was born, because sleep in this phase of her life (or any, I hear), is just non-existant. And when I do, it's with one ear open.

Even further back, I don't think, despite exhaustion, that pure, unadulterated sleep came during the pregnancy - too much to do to get ready, work, school...you name it.

I really can't remember. I really want to - either that, or experience it again, in all its glorious innocence.

It reminds me of the Friends episode where Rachel is embarassed by Phoebe's childlike running - then tries it herself, on the sly. How much better is running when you don't care what you look like or who sees you?


I wonder if it's even possible for us, The Adults, to find that blissful state anymore. I hope so. Sleeping with abandon is on the top of my wish list for Santa.

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