Healthy Style: On Badassery

I originally posted a version of this over on my Weight Watchers Online blog. But I thought this fashion-interested world might want to read it...so here it is.

We've all been using it.

"I feel like a BAMF."

"I'm one of those people out in the freezing cold, running."

As compliments to others on their running, their yoga, their Tough Mudder, or their Crossfit,

"BEAST!"

It struck me the other day, as I read a post from a running friend about how and why to run in the cold. I'm with her, 100%, I've found I love it, but something isn't sitting right about one of her reasons for getting out in the cold: "I'm usually the only one out there at 5am in the freezing cold, and if I see others, they're usually much younger, and men. So own the BAMF of being out there," or something like that. Why do we want to be a badass? Or maybe the question is "why do we call a strong, accomplished person who pushes themselves towards goals a badass?"

Isn't that a derogatory term?

We certainly use other phrases and words to describe our womanly selves: strong, committed, dedicated, healthy, thoughtful, gorgeous, brilliant... So why do we feel the need to steal terminology that otherwise applies to people we do not want to be? Even in my bloggery fashion world, I've got a Rocker Chic(k) Pinterest board, with lots of leather and studs, shit-kicker boots, and black eyeliner. I love that stuff. In fact, I'm wearing all black and my combat-like boots today (allbeit with a cozy hand-knit scarf, white wool coat, and fur hat and gloves, balancing that badass).

The fashion-y version of badass. Bullet bracelets and The Real Deal

I suppose it's because we want to feel strong - even when we don't. We want to feel that we can do anything, and byjesus, those biker chicks who kick their biker boys' a.sses whenever they like, well, they can do anything. I suppose it's because we want to leave the doubt of our "softer selves" behind, and charge forward without looking back. I suppose it's because, somehow, boys are still better at this than we are. In our heads, at least. I mean, really, no matter how strong a feminist we are - ahem - I am - there's still doubt. All the rocker chicks and wrestling divas and I'll-give-birth-then-acquire-a-company-2-hours-later CEOs, well, aren't they simply emulating the male?

I hear it now. If this were to "take off" on the interwebs like things do now, I'd be bashed up one side and down the other for saying women just want to be men.

It's alright. I can take it. I'm one of those BAMFer-ines people talk about.

For her birthday last year, H gave the newly 6-year-old Bean a "comic book" of Athena myths. She (and her brother) loves it. Admittedly, I picked it out for her, knowing he'd want her to have a link to her Greek heritage. And what better link than the original lady badass? True, Princess Diana, aka Wonder Woman (also a hero in our superhero-ridden home), also comes from old mythology and the strength of the ages, but Athena? Don't mess with her. It's a message H and I want to the Bean to hear.

The Bean reading Athena to her brother

Be strong. Be true. Be honest. Be kind. Honor your parents and your elders. Speak up for and protect those who cannot speak for or defend themselves. Honor your heritage, your body, and your self by taking care of yourself, both mentally and physically.

And if a devious demi-god tries to get in the way, hold your head high, look forward, and walk right over them with your a.ss-kicking motorcycle boots.

 This year, she's going with a Frye Veronica slouch boot (last year, it was the moto-like Engineer Pull-on, kids' styles, here. We got hers at Nordstrom.). I, on the other hand, got my combat boots at Target

At Last (and we're not talking Etta James, here)

Finally, Fall Has Arrived!

Thank goodness.

If I'd had to endure one more ridiculous day of June weather with October light (you know how it just has that lovely pale orange cast?), I was going to...well...

I know there are more than a few of you out there in the Infintessimal Readership (ahem, Miss Scarlet) who are thrilled with the temperature drop. Sweaters, scarves, here we come!

So The Bean and I had a lovely day yesterday, starting with lunch with a dear friend in Georgetown.* Naturally, as part of lunch discussion (after baby and H talk), fashion came up. LatinaTerp was thrilled to have the rest of the afternoon, Bean-free (she has two lovlies), to do some wardrobe updating. The first thing on her list? Boots.

Now longer-term readers know that I have a love affair with boots - unrequited, for the most part. Apart from my amazing, honeymoon-bought Daslus, I search and search and search, to no avail. A big part of my dilemma is my calf size - I inhertited my dad's great, muscular calves. This means that 98% of the boots out there zip to within about an inch of the top before they start pinching. I know I'm not alone, either, in the calf-size dilemma - large or small calves, it's a problem. It's a discussion every fall, just like in this week's Talking Fashion.

There are manufacturers out there that make "larger" or "smaller" calf sizes, but apart from trying them on, quite frankly, there's not a whole lot a gal can do. You never know, based on cut, exactly where they'll fall.

But despite my dilemma, I search on (it usually takes me 3 years to find a new pair, which I subsequently wear to death. My first favorite pair I bought in Cambridge, England, on a jaunt with a dear friend, and wore them until the soles cracked right underneath me.) Here are a couple of my favorites for this season...

Gidigio for Carbon - these would ground a flirty little dress or skirt and frilly blouse. Think schoolmarm on crack.

Rockport (yup) sold at L.L. Bean (yup again). As a girl who grew up in "horse country" (the occasional fox hunt would dash through our backyard), I'm sucker for an equestrian style. Don't bother wearing it over your jeans (ugh, why torture yourself with skinny jeans?), but if you dare to wear this season's cozy sweater dress (I'm getting flashbacks to one I had 10 years ago), they'd be perfect. Or just plain old with a suit or skirt for the office.

I'm also a sucker for anything "hard," like Frye or Harley. Check out zappos.com for a great selection of Frye boots.

And what did LatinaTerp end up with, you ask? Earrings, 2 skirts, capris, and sunglasses. But no boots.

*Much to my dismay, I dressed my daughter in her absolute preppiest outfit (polo dress with whales). It was the dress on top, I swear!

Style Dilemma: Birthday in Freezing Cold NYC

Scarlet writes: So we're going to NYC this weekend for my birthday and it's going to be super cold and we'll be walking a lot, but I want to look stylish and trendy. Thoughts?

Scarlet, first of all, HAPPY BIRTHDAY! A Weekend in NYC is a perfect way to spend a birthday, in my book. But then, I'm the one who giddily spent her honeymoon there, so...

Secondly, down to business.

1) Coat checks are your friend (make like a boy going to a bachelor party, and keep some singles on hand for the nice people who "watch" your coat)

2) Scarves are always a fab accessory (as is not freezing)

3) Boots. Preferably something flat. Think equestrian or, better yet, farmer (but please no Uggs!). Don't know how you feel about the "tucked in look," but this is one of the few times I agree with it - with no-nonsense, eternally flattering farm-related boots (think rugged, like the Frye version at right, or elegant, more like the Ralph Lauren pair I didn't win on e-Bay last week). And I love them non-chalantly with tights and a flowy dress (but only for inside this freezing cold weekend!)

4) Layers - under the coat you're going to check at the restaurants, museums and clubs.

5) If you must wear a skirt (and I don't mind saying that you'd be insane to), Tights. Capital "T."

6) Be a Lady. Wear gloves. I'm still in love with the now "so over" longer-sleeved versions. But a demure, cashmere-lined (must have lined) pair of leather will do. Color? Your choice. If it's too cold for gloves, go Totally Silly and wear an off-the-wall pair of mittens, but keep the rest of your ensemble sedate.

As far as tops, cowl neck sweaters and graceful dolman-sleeve sweaters (perfect opportunity to wear one before spring, for example) are some of my cold weather friends. But always put a presentable and stylish cami or T underneath, in case whereever you are is sauna-like. Or wear a tunic like the Target version at right, and make my grandmother ("Make sure your coat covers your bottom!") happy.

Bottoms? Jeans. Trouser jeans. Thank goodness they're back. Or dressier trousers. (But neither with the tunic. Stay skinnier with a tunic.) Good thing about these? They're usually wool. That's a good thing in the cold.